I am, shit

Who are the biggest suckers? Those who pull the strings or those who are being pulled? Both. Ultimately none of it matters. Power is only such when sustained indefinitely, otherwise it is just a temporary storage of energy.
If nothing is linear, then nothing is permanent. If nothing is permanent then why bother?
My parents used to tell me, “if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.” Hence my recent silence.
No time, too much time. No desires, too many desires. Blablabla.
Life is indeed sad when you can no longer get enjoyment from a cold beer.
Why do I involve myself in other people's lives? Ultimately I don't care about them or their well being (nor my own, for that matter). If my inner and outer world could align itself would I be any more pleased to breathe? I want my time here to be a long, straight rail road heading off into the horizon in a vast empty desert, no end destination, no initial departure point, no stops.

How refreshing a mental breeze!

I can't live. Not with other people. Not with myself. Not with empty hopes, fears, instincts, urges, control or reason. Frankly, i no longer give a shit if the world is being polluted to fuck, if people die or get tortured, if everything is royally falling apart. I don't care if you want to save the world, or if you feel sorry for others. I don't care about your favourite band, I don't care about your fucking pet or your birthday or where you want to go on holiday next summer. I don't care about how shit or amazing your job is. I don't care that smoking kills. I don't care about sickness or health, love or hate, pleasure or pain. They're just emotions generated by electricity and DNA. It is all, for want of a better word, bollocks.

But I am too much of a chicken shit, and we all know it.